A lesson from anoles

A lesson from anoles

The flat, preserved anoles

in my sister’s door frame

make me a little sad.

Why didn’t you move,

little lizards?

Maybe you had hung out

in the door frame before

and you thought you

were safe.

Perhaps you didn’t

recognize the

danger in delay.

Maybe you were

comfortable.

You clearly were

with friends

so maybe you

thought you

were in a good place.

The evidence

suggests otherwise,

my dear anoles.

Your demise reminds me

there’s a cost to

delaying change

when change needs to happen.

Your outline reminds me

that I sacrifice a dream

when I choose comfort

over courage.

Safe over brave.

When a move is a must

and I dig my heels in

to stay

where I am at

thankyouverymuch –

it will cost

me something –

every time.

#PermissionGranted

Worthy work

Worthy work

This being who you are –

who you are meant to be –

is not an easy road to walk.

And sometimes I

think it is supposed to be.

And that’s a lie.

I believe it is

worth the fight.

It’s worth wading

through the lies,

the pain, the grief,

the strife and anger

to get to a place

where you can

pursue what you are made for.

So if you are struggling,

it may not because

you are pursuing

the wrong thing.

It may just be that

being a whole person

is hard, worthy work.

#PermissionGranted

Lies cannot sustain.

Lies cannot sustain.

Lethargy is in her veins.

She is slow to feel,

slow to dream,

slow to fight.

She feels unsure in

every space,

unsure if she wants

to be seen

or if she wants

to be in the shadows.

She delays decisions

until they are

made for her.

Blooming is

left to

others

with more beauty

and talent.

Her plainness

disqualifies her.

Her hunger for more

no longer registers.

She just

moves

more

s l o w l y.

The billboards educate,

the lyrics choreograph,

the movies script

the pathways in

her brain

and

she’s too bone-weary

to fight.

She just goes through the motions,

does what is expected of her.

Lies are what sustains her,

but she can’t find a pulse.

#PermissionGranted

…to seek sustenance from truth.

It’s the same moon

It’s the same moon

The full moon was breath-taking last night when I saw it playing hide and seek behind some leafless trees.
It took my breath away because it was

so low,

so gigantic,

so faithful,

so unassuming.

Then, this morning it was low in the sky as I took my daughter to school. We embraced the moments we had with it and we kept looking for it as we made our way through the stoplights.

“There it is, again!”

“It’s like a sticker, it’s so perfect!”

And then it was quiet.

I am sitting at a traffic light.

Looking at the moon, trying not to feel.

I want to be present and not lean into

I am tired. I have questions. I am overwhelmed.

My girl doesn’t know all of these things.

And she doesn’t know how her shared excitement about the moon encouraged me to take a deep breath.

I am brought back to the present when I hear her sweet voice coming from the back of the car.

(She’s a singer, like her mama.)

She’s singing:

Away in a manger, no crib for his bed,

The little Lord Jesus laid down his sweet head;

The stars in the heavens looked down where he lay,

The little Lord Jesus, asleep on the hay.

The cattle are lowing; the poor baby wakes,

But little Lord Jesus, no crying he makes.

I love thee, Lord Jesus; look down from the sky

And stay by my cradle till morning is nigh.

Be near me, Lord Jesus; I ask thee to stay

Close by me forever, and love me, I pray.

Bless all the dear children in thy tender care,

And fit us for heaven to live with thee there.

And I look at the moon.

And I hear her song…

It’s the same moon.

The moon before me is the same moon that was in the sky at the birth of Jesus.

The same light was in the sky when he came so that we could stay close forever.

The tired, overwhelmed feelings I have are in part, a result of the pain that comes with stretching, with growth, and then partly due to being here on this earth with the wrongs that run rampant.

He’s fitting me for heaven – challenging the parts of me that need to change and he’s also placed within me a longing for his kingdom here on earth – I am reminded that he invites me to be a part of that work.

And again, I feel loved, seen, heard.

It’s the same moon

so low,

so gigantic,

so faithful,

so unassuming.

#PermissionGranted

Bravery is not a guarantee

Bravery is not a guarantee

Bravery is not a guarantee.

Bravery is not a trade for

the outcome you desire.

Bravery is just the 

next step you take. 

We don’t know what is

around the corner

but the next step

must still be taken.

It is an exercise in trust,

but don’t forget – 

you’re in good hands.

 

Bravery,

in the company of fear,

hope, and trust

is the engine to take you to 

where you are supposed to be.

Some days will be hard and you

will be tempted to believe that bravery 

has been overtaken by fear.

Fear is just the reminder 

that you can’t do life alone. 

Fear is just a warning bell 

that you are relying too much

on yourself. 

It’s time to trust and put fear in its place.

Bravery, 

is a lot of small steps – 

not giant leaps. 

Small steps forward,

are steps in the right direction

and don’t be tempted to 

even think they don’t count. 

We can celebrate the little wins

and use those to build courage. 

The fails?

Those are our guardrails

to help keep us on the 

path we are supposed to be on. 

There are no guarantees…

except that 

bravery equals growth. 

#PermissionGranted

 

Truth is louder

Truth is louder

Doubt won’t let me be great. 

I have ideas

but doubt says they’re dumb. 

Too often the ideas 

stay nebulous 

and never become 

living, breathing entities.

You can blame doubt for that. 

I walk into a room 

full of peers and 

question whether I belong,

wonder if there’s even

something I can offer. 

I stick to the periphery 

so that the opinion 

I imagine others have of me

won’t collude with 

my own doubt. 

I’m just not sure I’ve 

got the fortitude to take 

all of it on. 

Doubt won’t let me be great. 

Some days I struggle with

purpose, passion, and possibilities – 

is it really worth pursuing these?

Are these selfish pursuits?

Doubt always has a word. 

Doubt is loud. 

Doubt is persistent. 

Doubt is strong. 

Often I forget there are

other voices – 

Doubt’s isn’t the only 

voice I hear. 

What if I 

listen to the voice 

that created me 

and put purpose within me?

What happens if I 

train my heart to hear

the voice that says

there’s work for me to do?

It’s not all doubt’s fault. 

I choose what I listen to. 

When doubt is loud 

it is because I have 

forgotten who I am.

Doubt distracts me from 

what is most important

with slams and straight up lies.

But.

Truth has more to say. 

Truth is louder than doubt.

Truth will persevere.

Truth is stronger.

I’m gonna listen to Truth.

#PermissionGranted