A tinge of sweet

A tinge of sweet

It belongs –

but it doesn’t.

Wrong temperatures, 

wrong soil, 

incorrect amount of precipitation

and yet…

the pineapple

seems to be quite

happy here 

in Georgia soil.

It’s wrong, but it is right.

It’s unexpected, 

shocking, 

and sweet at the 

same time. 

Sometimes,

well, perhaps, 

more than I would like,

I find myself in the 

midst of unexpected. 

It feels wrong all 

the way around.

I can’t make 

any sense out of it. 

It makes as much sense

as a pineapple

growing in 

Georgia clay. 

I have to let go of 

the desire for 

all to make sense to me.

There are things 

I do not know and

I can’t see what’s ahead.

When I let go of 

what I expect, 

when I embrace 

what is, 

somehow,

a

tinge

of

sweet

meets me there.

I’ll give myself

permission to 

look for it. 

#PermissionGranted

Sown in the Unknown

Sown in the Unknown

Somehow,

someway, 

something grew. 

I don’t remember 

planting, watering 

or fertilizing the

fruit I am holding.

At some point

something 

found good soil, 

put down roots,

grew green shoots, 

blossomed and now

I have fruit.

I am astounded 

to be holding fruit.

When did this germinate?

I trace back the 

origin of the gift 

of sweet harvest

and discover it was

planted during 

one of the hardest,

driest, most challenging 

seasons I’ve ever experienced. 

I am baffled and I weep

due to the friction of the 

joy scraping against 

grief and pain.

I was unaware 

there would be

a harvest.

There’s no way to know

what will be sown 

in the unknown.

#PermissionGranted

 

Friends, there will be growth, even in the middle of a pandemic, stay present and try to have an open heart and mind. Be prepared to be surprised by a harvest.

Veil of fog

Veil of fog

Fog.

Thick, real.

Joy and hope

play a game

of hide and seek

I did not ask

to participate in.

The future holds

question marks –

so many unknowns…

The fog

clouds vision,

tangles emotion,

and I just want to

hibernate.

The swath

of clouds hangs

over every area of life

and I wonder

if this veil will

lift and what life

will look like

when it does.

Where is the sun?

Has the fog

smothered hope?

I look down

to see there’s

a rope in my hand.

I am tethered.

I am not lost

to the fog.

I will cling

to what is

holding me.

 

#PermissionGranted

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

See the miracles

See the miracles

The sun shines on my back

while the moon’s glow

lights up my face.

It is still daytime

but the moon

arrived early.

I love it when

the moon appears

in the sky at the same

time as the sun.

It’s two miracles at once.

The sun to grow life.

the moon to

light up the

darkness.

There is light

no matter which

way I am facing.

I am covered

no matter

which way I

orient myself.

I am surrounded by

care and provision

and I am

overwhelmed by love.

And this,

this is the

third miracle.

#PermissionGranted

Lies cannot sustain.

Lies cannot sustain.

Lethargy is in her veins.

She is slow to feel,

slow to dream,

slow to fight.

She feels unsure in

every space,

unsure if she wants

to be seen

or if she wants

to be in the shadows.

She delays decisions

until they are

made for her.

Blooming is

left to

others

with more beauty

and talent.

Her plainness

disqualifies her.

Her hunger for more

no longer registers.

She just

moves

more

s l o w l y.

The billboards educate,

the lyrics choreograph,

the movies script

the pathways in

her brain

and

she’s too bone-weary

to fight.

She just goes through the motions,

does what is expected of her.

Lies are what sustains her,

but she can’t find a pulse.

#PermissionGranted

…to seek sustenance from truth.

Hush, fear of failure, hush.

Hush, fear of failure, hush.

My friend invited me to go on a hike on New Year’s Day.

I informed her I was not in shape for a hike that she would take and she informed me that she was going for a run on her own prior to the hike.

In other words, the hike was her cool down – I should be good.

I was still worried that my heart was going to beat out of my chest at the peak of the hike.

I just didn’t think I was going to be able to hang.

I didn’t want it to look like I couldn’t handle it…

I didn’t want to have to stop for a break.

I was afraid that I would be sore the next day.

It was also going to be a cold morning.

But I went.

And you know what? The challenge was good for me.

I am stronger than I thought.

I huffed and puffed a few times but it felt good.

I am capable of hard things.

It’s my mind that limits what’s possible.

It’s my fear of failure that says no.

It’s me that can talk me out of anything.

And the 3.2 mile hike on uneven ground at funky angles gave me a thirst for more challenge.

Who is this girl?

It was a great way to start the new year.

I want to pursue things that make me wonder, “Am I am up for this?”

I want to welcome opportunities that include a risk of failure.

“Where is Bethany and what have you done with her?”

I know that what I attempt will not be within my own power.

I can do hard things.

Please remind me of this in a few months…

No, really I mean it.

#PermissionGranted